Brain Boosting Board Games

Games are great for kids for different reasons at different ages. For preschoolers, they’re a fun way to learn how to “follow rules, focus, take turns, and defer gratification, which helps with self-regulation, the basis of problem-solving and thinking creatively,” explains Peter J. Pizzolongo, the senior director of professional development at theNational Association for the Education of Young Children. Board games also get bonus points for bringing families together (especially if family dinners are a rare occurrence) and for luring grade-schoolers away from the Wii. And all kids get lessons in decision-making (“Should I buy Boardwalk or save my money?”), consequences (“Ooops—no more cash!”), and strategic thinking (“If I swap two railroads for Boardwalk, I can start buying houses”).

So should you set up regular times to play or let your child set the agenda?

“Both,” says Pizzolongo. “Let your child come to you, but setting aside a special evening or afternoon gives her a ritual—and predictability and routines are important for kids.” For ideas on what to play, read on for the games that get the highest marks from experts.

Uno

This card game for two or more players can be aged up (the original, with words, numbers, and colors) or down (with Thomas the Tank Engine or Disney Princess characters), says Shannon Eis, a play and development expert and mom of two. It’s good for preschoolers to about age 8 or 9.

How you play it: Shuffle the deck of 108 cards and deal seven to each player. Put the rest of the cards in a pile, and turn one over. The card that’s face up is the start of the discard pile; the larger one is the pile you draw cards from. Each person must put down a card that’s either the same number or color as the card on the discard pile. There are also wild cards and cards that cause a person to skip her turn, draw more cards, and so on. The first player with no cards wins.

What it teaches kids: Paying attention is a crucial skill in school—and that’s just what preschoolers pick up when they focus on the cards and remember to play the same color (or character). Besides reinforcing numbers and colors, Uno also sharpens pattern recognition: your child won’t take algebra until eighth grade, but patterns will help her understand the relationship between objects and numbers, which is the basis of algebra. Older kids get lessons in logic, reasoning, and strategy by deciding which cards to throw down now and which to save for the next turn.

Bingo 

This is another game that can be tailored to preschoolers who don’t yet know their letters or numbers, says Eis. You can buy versions that are just shapes, colors, or everyday objects (Zingo), or you can just cut out photos of things that fascinate your little one (cars, say, or animals) from catalogs. Kindergarteners on up can play the classic version with letters and numbers.

How to play: Each player gets a pile of tokens and a card divided into a 25-square grid with 24 numbers and a blank space in the middle and a row on top that spell out “BINGO.” The caller picks out numbers from a basket, and calls it out: “B-5,” for example, or “I-26.” The first player to fill up a row with tokens—either diagonally, horizontally, or vertically—shouts “Bingo!” and wins the game.

What it teaches kids: No matter which version you’re playing, your cutie’s listening and memory skills will get a workout. Another benefit: she’ll practice her ability to visualize shapes and objects (and later, letters and numbers) and then match them on her card, both of which are necessary for learning to read and do math.

Dominoes

Dominoes is another grade-school game that can be scaled down to the preschool level by buying tiles in colors, Disney characters, or animals, instead of the classic tiles marked with dots (like dice) from 0 to 6, says Eis, who’s also a contributor to Time to Play.

How to play it: Put the 28 tiles face down on a table and shuffle them. Each player draw seven tiles, and the rest are left in what’s known as the “boneyard.” The person with the highest double tile goes first, placing the domino on the table. The next player must match one of the halves with a tile containing the same number or character. If a player can’t make a match, she has to draw a tile from the boneyard. The player who gets rid of all the dominoes wins. Older kids can play for points—the first one to reach 50 or 100 wins the game.

What it teaches kids: Besides being a good way to get kids to recognize numbers or objects quickly, dominoes is also good at honing a kid’s ability to spot patterns, since that’s what you need to make a match. The game also sharpens critical thinking and strategy, since older kids must decide how to maximize the number of points.

Connect Four/Connect 4 Launchers

Connect Four and Connect 4 Launchers (an updated version of the classic) provide the right type of challenge for your grade-schooler, who’s developmentally ready to become a better strategist, Eis explains. Yes, she’s still a sore loser (especially when she plays with you), but she’s also learning what she’ll need to do to win the game next time around.

How to play it: Connect Four is like a combo of tic-tac-toe and checkers for two players. Each player picks a color, gets their pile of 21 checkers, and then takes turn sliding a checker into a plastic grid. The player who gets four in a row—either horizontally, vertically, or diagonally—wins. Connect 4 Launchers lets players launch their checkers onto a two-tiered platform, adding a new element of challenge: Now your child has to send her checker flying in such a way that it hits the right spot on the grid.

What it teaches kids: To win the game, your child has to plan out her moves, so both versions sharpen her abilities to think critically and logically. Plus, she not only has to focus on what she’s doing, but on what her opponent is too—a skill known as divided attention.

Bananagrams

If your child is too young or too impatient for Scrabble, get her started on this take-and-play-anywhere word game that’s great for kids 5 and up.

How to play it: Dump out the 144 letter-tiles face down on the table. Each player takes at least 21 tiles (fewer if you have more than four players) and, after someone yells “Split!”, starts to create her own crossword puzzle, racing to finish before the others. When you run out of tiles, yell, “Peel!” and everyone must pick a tile from the bunch in the middle. The player who uses up all the tiles wins—provided there are no more left in the bunch to pick from.

What it teaches kids: Like Scrabble, this fast-paced game is a reading, writing, spelling, and vocabulary booster.

Monopoly

By the time your child is in third grade, she’s mastered the basics, so what she needs now are games that teach her patience, persistence, and flexibility, says Eis.

How to play it: Players scoot along the board, buying up property, building houses, and amassing as much play-money cash as possible. The object is to become the richest player by bankrupting your opponents. Along the way are chance cards that can change a player’s luck. Monopoly Junior is a scaled-back version for kids 5 to 8, with amusement park rides and ticket booths instead of properties and houses.

What it teaches kids: Besides giving kids practice in making change, Monopoly is a fun way to teach such grown-up concepts as saving, budgeting, and financial planning. Plus the random element (“Go directly to jail!”) teaches your child how to adapt to sudden changes.

To find out more brain boosting games, click here:

http://www.parenting.com/gallery/board-games-boost-brain-power?view=home&pnid=511014

Car Seat Safety Questions Answered

Car seats keep your child safe, right?  Not always.  Sometimes car seats can fail if not taken care of or disposed of properly when they have experienced too much wear, reached their expiration date, or been involved in an accident.  With each of these factors, a car seat’s ability to protect your child drops significantly. 

Sarah Tilton, the Child Passenger Safety Advocate for BRITAX Child Safety Inc., helped us answer the most important questions you need to know about keeping your child safe in her car seat.

How long can I use my child’s car seat?

Every car seat is different, so always read the user guide to find out the seat’s expiration date and other important information.  Most car seats last between five to nine years after they were manufactured (not necessarily after they were bought); that’s why it is important to check the user guide.  Most infant car seats are the same. 

You can also find the expiration date molded in the car seat or printed on the shell, along with labels listing contact information and other necessary safety information.

Why do car seats expire?

Safety standards change over time as safer technology is developed. Expiration dates not only alert you to the possibility that your car seat may be worn out, but they also provide an opportunity for you to buy a new seat that is safer for your child.

What makes one car seat last longer than another?

The type of materials used in a car seat effect the expiration date and how the seat will perform in a crash or wear over time. Depending on the type, the design, the kind of installation, and the materials used to make the car seat all affect how long the seat will last and how safe it is in a crash.

Is it ever okay for me to borrow a car seat or buy one used?

Borrowing or buying a second-hand car seat is not recommended unless you can, without a doubt, answer these four crucial questions:

• Has this car seat ever been in a crash?
• Are all the parts and pieces still attached to the car seat?
• Are all the labels for proper use still affixed to the car seat?
• Has this car seat ever been recalled?

If you cannot find the answer to these questions, or if the seat should fail in any of these areas, do not use or buy the seat.

How important is the instruction manual?

Always keep it or upload from the manufacturer’s website. It informs you of the expiration date, the recommended cleaning options, proper harness rethreading, correct installation and use as well as proper disposal methods.

If my car seat is involved in an accident, can I still use it?

Follow the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration’s guidelines that recommend discontinuing use of a car seat if it has been in a moderate to severe crash.  You can keep it if the crash can be defined as minor, meaning it meets ALL of following criteria:

• The vehicle was able to be driven away from the crash site.
• The vehicle door nearest the child restraint was undamaged.
• There were no injuries to any of the vehicle occupants.
• The air bags (if present) did not deploy.
• There is no visible damage to the car seat.

How do I know when to retire my car seat?

Car seats should be destroyed after their expiration date or if it has any missing or broken parts. The reason for destroying rather than just throwing it out is so that it will not be improperly used by an unknowing third-party who may then put a child’s safety at risk.

How do I dispose of my car seat? 

Before throwing the car seat to the curb, you should cut off all of the webbing, cut up the cover, remove or blackout the serial number and manufacture date and write “trash, do not use” on the car seat shell.

Are car seats recyclable?

Tammy Franks, the Child Passenger Safety Coordinator for The Children’s Hospital at Legacy Emanuel, Portland, Oregon, also joined the discussion and informed us of the growing option of actually recycling your old or used car seat.  Some parts of the seat cannot be recycled, Franks says, such as the urethane foam and the fabric, but you can contact your local recycling agency to see what parts of the seat they will accept or try your local Child Passenger Safety state contact (www.safekids.org) to see if they have additional information on recycling options and locations in your area.

You can also read the link here:

http://www.parenting.com/article/car-seat-guidelines?src=soc&dom=tw

Solving Squabbles: How to Deal with Sibling Rivalry

When I first brought my daughter, Genie, home from the hospital, I expected a mixed reaction from her big sister, Clara, then 3. It was mixed, all right, a bubbling brew of jealousy and curiosity—but mainly, she was curious about how I'd react if she either poked Genie or hugged her too hard. Concerned, I did what I could to help Clara adjust. We spent quality time alone. I read her those “I'm a Big Sister” books. Finally, one morning she was nothing but nice to Genie. “Good girl!” I gushed (you don't work at Parenting without learning about positive reinforcement). Then I gave her a red lollipop. (Yeah, you also don't work here without learning not to use a treat as a reward, but I was on maternity leave, k?)

I left the room for two minutes, then returned to nurse Genie. As I bent over her bassinet, I stopped in my tracks: She was smeared head to toe with red-lollipop juice.

Welcome to the wonderful world of sibling relationships. That “smear campaign” was just the start of what I've witnessed (and refereed) as my kids have grown—everything from sandbox one-upmanship (who can build a bigger castle?) to tugs-of-war over the Wiimote. Which is not to say my kids aren't attached to each other—when one gets invited on a playdate, the other mopes at home till she returns. So why all the agita?

“The rivalry you see—whether your children are fighting for a toy or the first turn on a swing—is really rooted in a struggle for your love and attention,” says Frances Walfish, Psy.D., a child and family psychotherapist in Beverly Hills, CA, and author of The Self-Aware Parent. “Kids want to know that Mom's and Dad's eyes are on them and them alone.” Which can't happen unless you give away all your little guys except one (admittedly, it can be an appealing thought at certain times). Instead, try these friction-defusing strategies.

oy Story

“Now that Dael is eight months old, he's moving around and playing more, and it's been hard for our daughter, Charlee, who's three, to share toys with him. When she sees Dael holding something she wants to play with, she snatches it out of his hand and cries.”
—Mike Granek, Vancouver, British Columbia

What's Really Up? Charlee's protests are a way to get the spotlight, says Geoffrey E. Putt, Psy.D., director of parenting and family support services at Akron Children's Hospital, in Ohio. “In effect, she's saying, ‘Look, I used to be your only focus, but now what, my brother gets my toys, too?’ Even if all you do is scold her for not sharing, it's still attention, and any attention from a parent still feels good to a child,” he observes.

How to Stop the Squabbling: This might sound like the opposite of what you should do, but start by making sure each kid has a few toys that belong only to him or her. That's right, not all toys should be shared. (They don't call it OurPretty Pony, now, do they?) “It's important for kids to know they have territory they can call their own,” explains Walfish. Be clear that all other toys are communal property. If the older sib snatches a plaything, that child loses it for a short time—the younger one can still play with it. Then encourage sharing, along with the rule that both need to behave in order to have access to the toy. Give them tons of positive feedback when they share, says Putt. Also give your older child a job: “Tell her ‘You're such a big kid, I need you to help your little brother learn how to play with toys properly,’ then suggest she show him how to use something, like a truck,” says Putt. “It'll help her feel valued and empowered, and almost superior—too much so to fight over every little toy. Then there's no longer a need for her to act up to get attention.”

Variable Interest Rates

“My girls are less than eighteen months apart—Annabelle Reese is three and Claire Elisabeth just turned two. But their personalities are totally different. My little one is a tomboy and loves playing outside, or with stuff like Tinkertoys. Her big sister likes to stay indoors and is sensitive to textures, so she likes to look at books or paint. They always want to be doing different activities.”
—Amanda Griffith, Norton, MA

What's Really Up? Nothing but human nature, says Walfish: “It's very common for siblings, even ones who are the same sex or close in age, to have few shared interests,” she explains. Of course, fights over which activity you'll all do can turn into a major struggle, which is why it's important to make sure each child's interests and preferences are honored part of the time.

How to Stop the Squabbling: You can't always foist an unwanted activity on a small child simply because her sib loves it. But as a parent, you'll have to indulge each kid once in a while. If your younger child loves swimming and the other can't stand water, for instance, try to arrange a weekend morning alone with your little mermaid at the public pool. When choosing joint activities, “look for ones that offer a little something for each child, such as baking. The more hands-on child can help mix dough, while your other can use cookie cutters or help watch the timer,” Walfish suggests. Walks are another great idea. “They give a more active sibling a chance to do something a bit physical, while the other child can count squirrels or pick flowers,” she says.

You can read the full article here:

http://www.parenting.com/article/dealing-sibling-rivalry?page=0,0

Terrible Two's: Are They or Aren't They?

Two-year-olds get all the buzz, but the truth is, tantrums and mayhem can strike at any age, for a variety of reasons. “Most toddlers begin testing limits shortly after their first birthday and continue until about age four,” says Ari Brown, M.D., author ofToddler 411.

So how did the Terrible Twos become such a pop-parenting phenomenon? “It's an old-fashioned idea and not supported by research,” says Alan Kazdin, Ph.D., director of the Parenting Center at Yale University. The term was coined in the 1950s, perhaps because so much pressure was put on families to be detergent-commercial perfect that the moment a child grew out of compliant infancy, moms were freaked out. But modern parents agree—every kid is different, and every year presents new joys and challenges. Read on for a fresh perspective on each stage.

Age 1

What's to Love: They can be wonderfully cuddly. And since many 1-year-olds haven't yet realized the power of the word “no” to antagonize you, they can often be more compliant than their 2- to 4-year-old sibs. Their distractible nature means you can get them to stop fiddling with the oven knob by giving them a pot and a spoon to bang with.

What's Tough About It: Establishing good sleep patterns is still a struggle throughout this year, as you drop the morning nap, lengthen the midday one, and solidify bedtime. All that snooze drama can make for an overtired, cranky kid. In addition, his limited vocabulary makes for misunderstandings. (He says “nana.” You put him on the phone with Nana Helen. He wanted a banana. Cue meltdown.)

How To Make the Most of It: They need about 13 hours of sleep (11 at night and 2 during the day), so try to make it happen, suggests Bronwyn Charlton, Ph.D., co-founder of SeedlingsGroup, a collective of child-development experts in New York City. Inadequate sleep stacks the deck against you: A tired toddler is a cranky toddler.

Age 2

What's to Love: There's no denying it—2-year-olds are stinking cute! Their curiosity about the world is infectious. And while they certainly get into trouble, their mishaps feel accidental, making them easier to forgive.

What's Tough Abour It: Two-year-olds are fully mobile. Translation: They're into everything. And that means this is the first time you've had to set limits (no climbing the bookcase, crossing the street, or picking up cigarette butts off the sidewalk). Your child has never heard “no” so many times in her short life—and she doesn't like it. To top it all off, 2-year-olds don't yet have the language to express feelings, so they resort to pitching fits. Their young brains can't handle extreme emotions without going a bit haywire.

How to Make The Most of It: Praise often: “You didn't throw any toys today! Great job!” When she blows her stack, ignore her, as long as she isn't hurting anyone. Yelling or attempts to subdue—even with affection—make tantrums last longer. Kazdin notes that a tantrum is a futile time for discipline. “Wait until your child is able to absorb what you say.”

Age 3

What's to Love: The reasoning skills that can make life with a 3-year-old trying also make it easier for him to understand why he has to wear sunscreen. And his ballooning vocabulary means no more misunderstandings. Plus, how cool is it that you're having a conversation with your kid?

What's Tough About It: “Research shows that age three is the peak of defiant behavior,” says Kazdin. You're more controlling (you have to be—he's a force of nature now!), but he wants autonomy desperately, which makes life a series of battles. And your child is up for it: That improved reasoning lets him enter into high-level negotiations (“I'll put on my pajamas now if you give me a piece of chocolate”).

 

How to Make the Most Out of It: If what he's doing—say, taking all the clothes out of his drawer—isn't hurting anyone, ignore him. “Behavior that gets no attention will go away,” promises Charlton. In nonnegotiable cases, carefully restrain your child or move him to another place.

Age 4

What's to Love: Your child's personality expresses itself more, so you'll know her triggers and what to do when something does set her off. And since she's likely in preschool now, you both get a break from each other. That makes a big difference in your energy and patience.

What's Tough About It: Think age 3, but with an even larger vocabulary with which to slay you. Plus, 4-year-olds are navigating new social waters in the outside world, so they're more likely to act up at home.

How to Make the Most Of It: When she has a fit, stay calm. Afterward, ask “Can you think of something better to do next time?” Share your own tricks, too: “When I get upset, I like to close my eyes and take a deep breath.”

To read more and to take the quiz on terrific or terrible two's, click here:

http://www.parenting.com/article/terrible-twos-myth?src=soc&dom=tw